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Thursday, July 24, 2008

"It's a BOODER!"

This won't be the first time that I've pointed out how hard-headed my boy child is. Long ago I discovered a little trick when he insisted on having something that I didn't want him to have at the time; I would tell him said object or activity was "taking a nap." For example, if he wanted to watch television and I was cutting him off for the day, I would just tell him, "The shows are taking a nap right now!" It has seemed to always work well for some reason. He just stops whining and screaming about whatever it was he wants and accepts what is apparently a perfectly logical explanation.

This afternoon I was headed downstairs with the kids. We were on our way out the basement door to the swimming pool and the sprinklers to play in the water on a hot day. Standing at the top of the stairs, I had my arms full of crocs, towels, water bottles, etc. Just as Dear Son was about to turn over and slide feet first down the stairs as he likes to do, he paused with his finger up his nose, pulled out a VERY LARGE specimen and held it out to me saying insistently, "HERE!" That means I'm supposed to take the extremely large booger that has its own pulse off his hands. Literally, off his hands.

I didn't respond fast enough, and so he raised his voice and said it again with a bit more insistence, "HE-ERE (with two syllables this time)! It's a BOODER!" You know, in case I hadn't figured that out. I responded again that I couldn't take his "BOODER" right now as my hands were full. He sat for a split second at the top of the stairs considering what to do about this dilemma before he quickly found a solution. He wiped the creature on the banister. I responded with a grossed out groan and a statement that I didn't want him wiping his "booders" on the banister, but he just sat admiring it in all its smeared glory on the wooden banister. I swear the thing was throbbing as we both gazed upon it. Then he proudly explained, "It's taking a nap!" Which of course meant that I was supposed to leave it there. I confess, I did leave it there. My hands were full after all. Besides, I wanted to save it to impress my child's father when he got home from work. What can I say...I don't want their bonding to end with Transformers!

7 comments:

JBlank said...

I am a longtime lurker on your blog, my children are 6 (boy) and 2 (girl). I just couldn't let the "boder" incident pass. My daughter is a class A booger picker. We have coached and coached. She now asks to "pick it" so we can get prepared. You see while riding in the car she picked and yelled "booger" I was not fast with finding a tissue. I said "wait a minute" she said "ok" and put the booger back until I was ready. I thought that I might be the only booger rangler around but it is good to have company.

Ed (zoesdad) said...

I'm sure your husband will be very proud of his boy.

CaraBee said...

OMG, I'm dying here!!! I can only hope that my delicate little daughter will not be a picker, but if she's anything like her daddy, who has actually shown me some of his, then I'm in for it. Can you believe a 35 year old man would do that? Believe it.

MGM said...

JBlank,
Welcome. I'm glad you decided to "de-lurk." All it took was a gigantic booger to lure you out from your hiding spot!

Maternal Mirth said...

As long as Son doesn't EAT it ... just say'in!

Kris said...

OMG!!! I have tears in my eyes, I am laughing so hard. What a cute story. I love how he calls the BOODERS!!!

This is the first time I have stumbled upon your blog. I may have to become your blog stalker. VERY WITTY!!

MGM said...

Kris,
Thanks for coming by and commenting. I'm always glad when I can lure a stalker out of the woodwork with tales of grossness! I hope you come back often!